Slap Me

My dearest love,

Do me a favor, would you?

If I ever, ever show even the slightest hint of having a crisis of confidence with you again…

Please slap me. Nice and hard. Make it count. Make it felt.

I mean, before… Maybe, if one were being very generous, I could have been forgiven.

Like… In those very early days, just trying to decide if you were actually being more friendly than usual, or if it was just wishful thinking…

Just one of the dangers of being in love with one of the friendliest women on the planet, I guess. One of the dangers of being one of the friendliest women on the planet, for that matter. And please don't take that the wrong way — your friendliness is very near the top of my very, very long list of things that I love about you.

Your vibe excites my vibe like no other vibe out there.

But it was confusing in the beginning, my love, especially for a dense old man like me.

Friendly waves… Inviting me to things… Somehow even “As you wish” left me with doubts… And that's on me, but…

This.

A woman does not invite a man into her home in the dark of night and offer him a beer, with no one else around but the kids, unless she is at the very least interested in spending time with him. Not even the friendliest woman on the planet.

I would like to think you've finally gotten it through this thick skull of mine. I'm sure you have.

But I also know myself.

So, while I will do my absolute very best to not need that slap…

I might. I'll try not to, but I might.

I just hope you know, too. That you never have a reason to doubt. That my overeager puppy dog reaction to that invitation said more than the words behind it. That maybe I let on even more than I thought while we stood there and chatted…

_{(…like maybe rattling off your maiden name like it ain't no thang that I knew it…)}

I suspect you know, anyways.

But I guess there is still one great big unanswered question…

What do we do about it?

Those kids, bless them… They aren't going to give us such an amazing excuse all that often. And, besides… I won't even be free, not like I was then, not until at least sometime in October…

Can I really wait that long to talk to you again? I mean… Without the others. I know we still have three things coming up on the calendar… and I am going to enjoy every second of all three of them so, so much… just soaking up your presence as much as I can.

But can I really wait that long to talk to you again?

sigh

I guess I realized one more thing I wish I had said: Can we have lunch together sometime. Or coffee. Or… something. Anything. Can I see you again?

Where do we go from here?

…and how sure are you that I'm not just dreaming?

Yours,
♒️